Sounds About Right

Luke (age 5) - "Since Dadda's not home, can I be the man of the house?"
Me - "I guess, but what are you going to do as man of the house?"
Luke - "I fink I will play video games all day."

Big Plans

Luke (age 4 1/2) - "When I grow up, I'm going to be Jesus."
Me - "Oh."

Getting to Know You

Luke (age 4 1/2) - "So. Where ya from?"
Sophie (age 2 1/2) - "Fuddruckers."

Everyone's a Critic

Luke (age 4 1/2) - "Do you like my sweet dance moves?"
Sophie (age 2 1/2) - "No."

Good Morning?

Me - "Hi! Good morning, Lukey!"
Luke (age 4) - "Hi."

Luke continues to stand in front of me and stare.

Me - "Hi."
Luke - "Us already did that."
Me - "What?"
Luke - "That 'hi' thing."
Me - "..."

Too Many Girls

Luke (age 4) - "Daddies have babies."

Me - "No, Mommies have the babies."

Luke - "But Daddies have babies, too. That's why dey are Daddies."

Me - "Oh, yes, they do. But all babies grow in Mommies' tummies."

Luke - "Oh, ok."

Five second pause

Luke - "You grow me a brudder? I need a brudder."

Me - "Umm, no."

Five second pause

Luke - "Peese?"

Luke - "He can seep in my woom wif me. I need a baby. But not a girl one."

I Don't

Lily (age 8 1/2) - "What are they building there?"
Me - "I don't know, Lil. Looks like a restaurant, maybe."
Lily - "What kind?"
Me - "I'm not sure. The construction isn't very far along."
Luke (age 4) - "I hope it's hot dogs!!"

Aloha

Ella (age 6 1/2) - "I wish I could go to Hawaii."
Me - "You've been."
Ella- "Really?"
Me - "Yes, Lily's been three times and you've been twice."
Ella - "And Lukey has never been."
Me - "No, Luke has only been when he was in my tummy."
Luke - "You...ated me?"

I Do Not Think It Means What You Think It Means

After falling over a small infant at the gym and making her cry*

Luke (age almost 4): "I meaned to do dat."



*Also heard after spilling an entire plate of spaghetti on the floor and after smashing my fingers in the pantry door.

Tubby Time

Luke (age almost 4) - "Mommy, I in tub too long."
Me - "Really? Why?"
Luke - "My toes are gwumpy."
Me - "Your toes are... grumpy?"
Luke - "Yes, wook at dem."
Me - "Oh! Your toes are wrinkly!"
Luke - "Yes. Dats whut I telled you. Gwumpy."

Scam Artist

Luke (age almost 4) - "Mommy, you give me Buzz Lightyear bandaid? This ouchie"
Me - "Come here, let me see what's wrong."
Luke - "Ok. It invisible, so you can't see, dough."

Much Too Busy

Sophie (age 2) - "Hep me! I stuck!"
Luke (age almost 4) - "I can't help you right now, woman."

Biting Words

Luke ( age almost 4) - "Mommy, Ella bite me!!"
Ella ( age 6 1/2) - "I did NOT!"
Luke - "You DID. You BITE me!"
Ella - "No. I just fell. With my mouth open. On your foot."

One Minor Problem

Luke, to whom Lily addressed this note, cannot read.

What's my name?

Luke (age 3 1/2) - "No, she's Annabella Victoria Robbins!"
Me - "Yes, that's her full name. What's yours?"
Luke - "Lukey!"
Me - "No, your full name, like 'Sophie Leigh Robbins' is Sophie's."
Luke - "Lukey! L-U-K-E!!!"
Me - "No, your middle name as well. Just like 'Lillian Rayne' is Lily's."
Luke - "Oh. Boogerface. Lukey Boogerface."

Stink

Me - "Luke, what's this?"
Luke (age 2 1/2) - "Hand."
Me - "What's this?"
Luke - "Eyebow."
Me - "What's this?"
Luke -  "Sock."
Me - "No, what's under the sock?"
Luke -  "Stink."

Birthday

Me - "Luke, what do you want for your birthday?"
Luke (age almost 3) - "Corn!"

Mario Kart

Luke (age 3), after a particularly exciting Mario Kart race - "Great job, me!!!"

Noise

Me -  "Luke!! What are you doing?"
Luke (age 3) - "Nuffing. You don't hear dat noise."

Santa

Me -"Luke! You have GOT to stop peeing in your pants."
Luke (age 3) - "Or Santa will bring me rocks?"
Me -  "..."
Me - "Yes!!! Or Santa will bring you rocks."