Wrong Side of the Bed

Me - "Good morning, Sophie!"
Sophie (age 2) - "No."

Five second pause, during which we eye each other.

Sophie - "Me need you coffee!"





* I don't actually drink coffee.

The Opera

Lily (age 8 1/2) - "My trip to the opera is on the 27th, Mommy. Don't forget."
Me - "I won't, Lil."
Ella (age 7) - "I wish I could go to the opera. I need to learn how to break glass."

PowerPoint

Me - "What did you girls do at school today?"
Lily (age 8 1/2) - "I finished my PowerPoint."
Ella (age almost 7) - "What's a PowerPoint?"
Lily - "It's something about something that you do for something."
Ella - "..."
Lily - "Mine was about penguins."

Is That So?

Ella (age almost 7) - "This meat sauce could use more sauce. I mean, it's good and all, but..."
Me - "And you could use less sass."
Ella - "It's part of my charm."

Good Morning?

Me - "Hi! Good morning, Lukey!"
Luke (age 4) - "Hi."

Luke continues to stand in front of me and stare.

Me - "Hi."
Luke - "Us already did that."
Me - "What?"
Luke - "That 'hi' thing."
Me - "..."

Pigskin Pigout

Lily (age 8 1/2) - "Man, I love football. I mean, really love it."
Me - "Oh, yeah?"
Lily - "Yes. I don't understand it. And I don't know who plays it. And I don't know the rules."
Me - "..."
Lily - "But the food is great!"

Even Babies Know

Sophie (age 2) - "Dat Ella too loud!!!!"